Stepping around the bovines 11 Nov 2012
What do you do when everyone treats you like a cow?
Mostly I think I'm going crazy.
And then I stop and realise that I'm not the mad one. They are. With their attempts to peg me in and conform to their rules.
But it's not natural. It's weird. It’s sick and disgusting.
It's almost too cruel to think about. They're telling me that I have to act like an animal and have … ready for it … sex with a cow. They’re minds are warped.
Why does no one come to my rescue? Why is no one listenning to me?
Imagine that – having sex with a cow. The smells. The hairy bits. Getting in between the legs where it's all animaly and moist and warm. Of god I'm gonna throw up.
But it's been going on for years. When I was young they made me drink milk from one. I gagged and choked. Is a glass too much to ask for?
And I've been forced to live in this barn for what seems like forever. It’s cold and damp. A bed, for goodness sake!
I’ll tell you this. I’d give a leg for something other to eat than grass. It absolutely does not agree with me. I’m firing on all six cylinders back there, if you know what I mean.
I used to try to stand up to them, but they wouldn't listen.
Once, when things were really tough, I decided that I couldn't live like this anymore. But I knew that fighting the system was futile.
I would have to be more subtle. I planned my attack for days. I rehearsed every step.
Then, one late morning, as if nothing unusual, I casually stepped out of the barn. So far so good. In fact, I made it all the way to the front of the house.
I timed it in the hope that the front door would be open. Just as I had my nose through the doorway, peering inside at the life I could be living, I was gently ushered back outside. Not a word of explanation. Where’s the dignity?
Now I spend as much time as possible outdoors. Here I am alone. Standing in the sun, on the top of a gentle hill. I try to enjoy the simple things.
I often watch the house and imagine the life inside. Occasionally I stare at the barn.
But mostly I just dream of leaving this place, just watching the cars go by.
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