North Korea's hair to the throne 7 Nov 2012
New evidence suggests that Kim Jong Un has taken the words ‘product’ and ‘regime’ a bit too close to heart.
For most citizens, the Hermit Kingdom has long been a palace of poverty. But for the inner circles of power, wealth lies in abundance. With the passing of Kim Jong-il in 2011, the ascension of Kim Jong-un to the helm was always going to signify a moment of change for the nation. Given Kim Jong-un’s past experiences in the USA, and his penchant for basketball, most foreign affairs analysts knew that his reign could open doors. Few, though, anticipated something as radical as what new images and reports suggest. It apparently started when Kim Jong-un was watching a performance of Lady Gaga in concert on YouTube. After the concert, she spoke to camera and boasted of her “miraculous hair regime”. A fan perhaps, but that doesn’t mitigate his competitive streak. Not wanting to be undone, he commanded his lieutenants and generals to scour the globe in search of the ultimate regime. Perhaps there was a problem of translation from North Korean to English. Perhaps there was just great haste to fulfill the supreme leader’s wishes. Either way, new images – illegally emailed out of the nation by an anonymous witness – clearly show that the country’s new leader has certainly attained a magnificent product regime. The anecdotal evidence was just today backed up by an announcement that came from North Korea’s official news agency. According to the statement, “The eternal regime of Supreme Leader Kim Jong-un has announced that under the new and modernised definition of Gross Domestic Product, consumption of hair product in the glorious nation of North Korea has increased the nation’s wealth to unprecedented proportions.” If the report were to be believed, then it seems that wealth now lies in abundance for all, not just the inner circles of power. |
Don't mess with the regime
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